One Hard Thing You Must Admit Before Your Life Slips Away

Admitting the Hard Truth, and Embracing It

Where you are and what you’re doing at any given moment is absolutely essential.

Because it is the only moment guaranteed to you.

You are not on your way somewhere else.

You are not progressing to a more important time or place.

The present is not just a stepping-stone—it is the ultimate destination, and you have already arrived.

This moment is where your greatest power lies.

This moment is your life!

It might seem obvious, but, again, I forget. And I know you do too.

All day, every day, many of us feel like the present isn’t enough—like our life isn’t worthy of our full presence. It’s a hard truth, but we have to admit…

We are continuously thinking about what’s to come, as if it’s not enough to appreciate what we have in front of us right now.
We sit down to relax for a moment and then immediately feel the urge to read something on our phones, check social media, or text someone, as if relaxing for a moment isn’t enough.
We procrastinate when it’s time to work, choosing more distractions, as if the process of doing good work isn’t enough for us.
We get annoyed with people when they fail to live up to our expectations, as if the reality of who they are isn’t enough for us.
We reject situations, people, and even ourselves, because we feel like we need more, more, more…
But what if we did the opposite?

What if we accepted this moment, and everything and everyone in it (including ourselves), as exactly enough?

What if we admitted that life is slipping away right now, and saw the fleeting time we have as enough, without needing to share it on social media or capture it or alter it in any way?

What if we accepted the “bad” with the good, the letdowns with the lessons, the annoying with the beautiful, the anxiety with the opportunity, as part of a package deal that this moment alone is offering us?

What if we paused right now, and saw everything with perfect clarity and no distractions?

Keep thinking about it…

Would we live more meaningful and memorable lives?

Would we have more beautiful stories to cherish and share?

I think we would.

And thus, I think now is the best time to pay attention.

Now is the best time to look around and be grateful—for our health, our homes, our families, our friends, and our momentary opportunities.

Nothing lasts.

Everything is happening, and changing, before our eyes.

Let’s do our best to be naked and free and aware of every little climactic moment, together.

(MARCANDANGEL).

Everyone will not understand you

The day we kill the need for validation is the day we truly begin to live – Samuel Okonkwo

You don’t owe anyone an explanation for your opinions, beliefs, and perceptions. Every man has a right to forge his own views. Not everybody will understand your journey; that is okay. You are here to live your life not to make everyone understand. Be conscious of this at all times. Not everyone will understand what you want to accomplish in your career. Maybe you want a new job but the people in your life tell you to forget about it and just be happy where you are. Or, you want a new career, but you are told it doesn't make sense or you won't make enough money. Or, you want to start a business that you have been thinking about for years, and you hear about how no one will visit your establishment.

Do you have career dreams or wishes that you want to come true, but when you tell people your thoughts they have no idea what you are saying? Or, they understand your words, but then they try to talk you out of it, or they give you a long speech about why it won't work. What do you do when in your heart you know the right next move for your career, but no one else agrees with you on this?

Forget about what others are doing and saying about you. Stop looking at where they are and what they have. Nobody is doing better than you because nobody can do better than you. YOU are walking your own path. Sometimes the reason we struggle with insecurity is because we compare our behind-the-scenes circumstances with everyone else’s public highlight reel. We listen to the noise of the world, instead of ourselves. So stop the comparisons! Ignore the distractions. Listen to your own inner voice. Mind your own business. Keep your best wishes and your biggest goals close to your heart and dedicate time to them every day. Don’t be scared to walk alone, and don’t be scared to enjoy it. Don’t let anyone’s ignorance, drama, or negativity stop you from being the best you can be. Keep doing what you know in your heart is right, for YOU. Because when you are focused on meaningful work and at peace within yourself, almost nothing can shake you.

Some people will refuse to accept that you are no longer who you used to be – that you’ve made mistakes in the past, learned from them, and moved past them. They may not be able to stand the fact that you’re growing and moving on with your life, and so they will try to drag your past to catch up with you. Do not help them by acknowledging their negative behavior. Keep moving forward. Nobody will ever be as invested or interested in your life as you. Only you know what is best for you, and that entails learning from your own choices. The only way you will ever truly learn is through making your own decisions, taking full responsibility for them, and that way if you do fail, at least you can learn from it wholeheartedly, as opposed to blame-shifting it onto somebody else. If you want to live a meaningful and fulfilled life, you have to own your choices and learn from them. This will build your character and help you grow.

Holding on to the unchangeable past is a waste of energy and serves no purpose in creating a better day today. If someone continuously judges you by your past and holds it against you, you might have to repair your future by leaving them behind. People say they are here to help, yet more often than not, end up pushing those in need down even further. Telling them to just get over it. To think more positively. If you allow others to define your dreams and abilities, then you enable them to hold you back. What you’re capable of achieving is not a function of what other people think is possible for you. What you’re capable of achieving depends on what you choose to do with your time and energy. People will throw all sorts of assumptions your way about what is possible and what is impossible. Look beyond the presumptions and mental limitations of others, and connect with your own best vision of how YOUR life can be. Life is an open-ended journey, and what you achieve comes from what you expect to achieve and what you work to achieve. So don’t worry about what everyone else thinks. Keep living your truth. The only people that will get mad at you for doing so are those who want you to live a lie.

Culled from my book (The Path Less Travelled - https://www.amazon.com/Path-Less-Travelled-Reflections-Learning/dp/1540663507/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1508077706&sr=8-1&keywords=samuel+okonkwo)

10 Regrets Too Many People Will Have in 10 Years

1. Not spending enough quality time with the right people. — At some point, you’ll just want to be around the few people who make you smile for all the right reasons. So today, spend more time with those who help you love yourself more—spend more time with those who make you feel good, and less time with those who you feel pressured to impress. Never be too busy to make room in your day for the ones who matter most. And remember that nothing you can give will ever be more appreciated than your sincere, focused attention—your full presence. Truly being with someone, and listening without a clock and without anticipation of the next event, is the ultimate compliment.

2. Not expressing your love openly and honestly with those you love. — Without question, you’re going to lose people in your life. Realize that no matter how much time you spend with someone, or how much you appreciate them, sometimes it will never seem like you had enough time together. Don’t learn this lesson the hard way. Express your love! Tell people what you need to tell them. Don’t shy away from important conversations because you feel awkward or uncomfortable. You never know when you might lose your opportunity. Is it really possible to tell someone what you feel? Yes, it is. They won’t always understand, because even when they’ve heard you, they can’t feel exactly what you feel inside. But you still have to speak up for your own peace of mind. If you appreciate someone today, tell them. If you have something else important to say, say it. Hearts are often confused and broken open by words left unspoken.

3. Basing a significant portion of your self-worth on other people’s opinions of you. — We tend to forget that most people judge us based on experiences from their own life that have absolutely nothing to do with us. For example, a person might assume things about you based entirely on a troubled past experience they had with someone else who looks somewhat like you. Therefore, basing any part of your self-worth on what they think puts you in limbo—you are literally at the mercy of their unreliable, bias perspective. If they see you in the right light, and respond to you in a positive, affirming manner, then you feel good about yourself. And if not, you feel like you did something wrong. The bottom line is that you will never find your worth in another human being—you find it in yourself, and then you will attract those who are worthy of your energy. And in the meantime, not overreacting or taking things personally will keep your mind clear and your heart at peace.

4. Being too busy impressing others and forgetting about what matters to YOU. — Ten years from now it won’t really matter what shoes you wore today, how your hair looked, or what brand of clothes you wore. What will matter is how you lived, how you loved, and what you learned along the way. So forget about impressing people for the sake of it. Be real instead! If you want to impress someone, impress yourself by making progress on something you’re sincerely proud of. Focus on what matters! It’s truly amazing what you can accomplish in a day when you aren’t incessantly worried about what everyone else in the world is thinking and doing. Just show yourself that you can grow and get better. It’s never about impressing or competing with others. In the end, it’s just you vs. you.

5. Letting uncertainty paralyze you. — Trust me now and thank me later, embrace uncertainty! Because some of the most incredible chapters of your life won’t have a title you feel comfortable with until much later. Living is risky business. Every decision, every interaction, every step, every time you get out of bed in the morning, you take a small, uncertain risk. To truly live is to know you’re getting up and taking that risk, and to trust yourself to take it. If you don’t—if you let uncertainty win—you will never know anything for sure, and in many ways this unknowing will be worse than finding out your hunch was wrong. Because if you were wrong, you could make adjustments and carry on with your life without ever looking back and wondering what might have been. Remember this, and find the courage you need! You don’t need guarantees 24/7. That’s not how life works. In life you can be comfortable or courageous, but not both at once.

6. Focusing on failures instead of opportunities. — Well, it’s true, you have failed and you have been hurt in the past. But it’s also true that you have loved, and been loved. That you have risked, and received. That you have grown not just older, but wiser. And all of this carries a weight of its own—a greater weight than any particular failure or wound. In fact, it’s better to have a life full of small wounds and failures that you learned from, rather than a lifetime filled with the regrets of never trying. Think about it! Have you ever seen a toddler learn to walk? They stumble and fall numerous times before getting it right. The falls are learning opportunities. Oftentimes it takes pain and patience to make lasting progress. So don’t let time pass you by like a hand waving from a train you desperately want to be on. Don’t spend the rest of your life thinking about why you didn’t do what you can do right now.

7. Holding on too tight to every ideal, and then missing out on real opportunities. — You can’t lose what you never had, you can’t keep what’s not yours, and you can’t hold on to something that does not want to stay. But you can drive yourself mad by trying. What you need to realize is that most things are only a part of your life because you keep thinking about them. Stop holding on to what hurts, and make room for what feels right! Do not let what is out of your control interfere with all the things you can control. In other words, say “goodbye” to what didn’t work out so you can say “hello” to what might. In life, goodbyes are a gift. When certain people walk away from you, and certain opportunities close their doors on you, there is no need to hold on to them or pray to keep them present in your life. If they close you out, take it as a direct indication that these people, circumstances and opportunities are not part of the next chapter in your life. It’s a hint that your personal growth requires someone different or something more, and life is simply making room.

8. Playing the victim for far too long. — If you always play the victim, you will always be treated like one. Life isn’t fair, but you don’t have to let the past define your future. Remember that time you thought you couldn’t make it through? You did, and you’ll do it again. Don’t let your challenges get the best of you. Don’t let your insecurities bully you into a corner. Don’t be your own victim! Take the next smallest step. The greatest of all mistakes is to do nothing simply because you can only do a little. And you can ALWAYS do a little! Where you are right now is necessary. Sometimes we avoid experiencing exactly where we are because we have developed a belief, based on our ideals, that it is not where we should be. But the truth is, where you are right now is exactly where you need to be to take the next smallest step forward.

9. Waiting, overanalyzing, and never taking the necessary steps. — Too often we waste our time waiting for the ideal path to appear, but it never does, because we forget that paths are made by walking, not waiting. Remember this! It’s easy to be lazy and wait around. It’s easy to waste another day. But you need to do the opposite! Decide what you want to accomplish and get it done. Action is worry’s worst enemy. Action is the best ammunition. Action brings progress! So do not confuse senseless movement with real action. Whenever you find yourself at a point of intense decision-making where you’re caught in a cycle of over-analysis and hesitation, and you’re making zero progress, take a deep breath, break the cycle, make an educated guess on the next logical step, and take it. Even if you get it wrong, you will learn something useful that will help you get it right. A daily ritual of small, positive steps is the ultimate key.

10. Being too busy to appreciate your life. — Take action, work hard, but don’t forget to pause and pay attention to life’s little moments too. That’s honestly the best advice there is. Realize that life is simply a collection of little chances for happiness, each lived one moment at a time. That some time each day should be spent noticing the beauty in the space between the big events. That moments of dreaming and sunsets and refreshing breezes cannot be bettered. But most of all, realize that life is about being present, watching and listening and working without a clock and without anticipation of results at every moment, and sometimes, on really good days, for letting these little moments fill your heart with intense gratitude. Truth be told, you will inevitably, whether tomorrow or on your deathbed, come to wish that you had spent less time worrying and rushing through your life, and more time actually being mindful and appreciative of each day.

(MARCANDANGEL).

Nigeria @ 57: Teething Problems, Clutching Straws and Deceiving Self

‘The most significant appeal of President Buhari’s candidacy in 2015 was the national consensus then that he would be principled, decisive, firm and precise on matters of public morality. Sadly, his failure to act promptly and decisively at critical moments when the public expected clarity has dulled his original appeal and cast doubts on his sincerity. In the process, the dividing line between right and wrong in our nation has further blurred. Therefore, the burden for the president at this most critical period is twofold: first to salvage the credibility of his wobbly administration and, most importantly, to restore public confidence in his personal integrity as a genuine national leader and moral beacon.’
- Segun Adeniyi (ThisDay 28th September 2017).

As the nation ushers in the routine pomp and pageantry that accompanies her Independence Day anniversary, the mood is dampen by a collective frustration and national disappointment. I had culled the above from Segun’s article on the backpage of ThisDay newspaper to aptly capture the country’s mood today. The jury is still out on the final say of this administration’s first term but a consensus has been reached on a few things. President Buhari has lived short of the massive expectation that attended his triumphant entry in 2015. Even his biggest apologist cannot deny the fact that we could have been further ahead with over two years on. As Simon Kolawole puts it ‘Nigeria is 57, going by the year of independence, and the consensus in every corner is that we can be, and should have been, better than this.’

Perhaps, one of the most fundamental problem with Nigeria is the dishonesty posture we take, even to ourselves. We lie to ourselves about how far we have come. We find solace for our incompetence and make comparisons that makes us ‘look good’ in the grand scheme of things. A few contexts will suffice. With over two years down the line, the Power sector has been a failure. Certainly, there are plausible explanations to validate the excuse; but they will remain mere explanations. From the volatility in the creeks that have forced epileptic gas production, to the unavailability of proper gas turbines, to the nightmare that is the transmission companies, the progress has been at a snail’s pace. The campaign promise to deliver 20,000 megawatts of electricity was not hinged on favourable conditions. It was the job of this administration to ensure the conditions are right not heave a sigh and throw their hands in despondency as if to say ‘it is not our fault o’. Word on the street is that this is the worse we have ever had it with Power.

At the crux of President Buhari’s agenda, was the fight against corruption. In the eyes of many, he was the ‘poster boy’ of this fight; a man whose greatest asset was his integrity, both perceived and real. However, for all the razzmatazz that have greeted the anti-corruption drive, there is a genuine feeling that it has largely been a façade. Monies have been recovered but that is just about it. The anti-corruption war is not won on the pages of newspapers or at the head office of EFCC. The war has been fought haphazardly and largely uncoordinated. While the media trials have been successful, there has been no notable court conviction made since the inception of this agenda. It gives a sense that we are playing to the gallery on this one. Speak of the ills of corruption all you like, but if you don’t close the loopholes, strengthen the controls and follow through on court convictions, then you are a glorified nimrod full of sound and fury only. The establishment of dedicated corruption courts is coming over two years late. Suffice it to say, the anti-corruption fight will also remain lopsided if it continues to be selective. This government have missed opportunities to make a statement about a holistic approach to this war. A case in point is what has become of the report of the Osinbanjo led panel to investigate corruption claims against the suspended Secretary to the Government, Babachir Lawal. The report has since been submitted but the silence has been deafening in this regard.

No nation makes progress without choosing to go the path less travelled and take the tough decisions. Divorcing the Nigerian marriage might be a pandora’s box many are unwilling to open but it is a no-brainer that restructuring, realigning and renegotiating the terms of this marriage is the way to go. It is great to quell insurrections whenever they arise, but to always do this without unearthing the reasons for the insurrections is to specialize in ‘self deceit.’

It is a barely two years until Nigerians return to the polls, and while there is hardly an opposition party worthy of the name, the feeling towards this government is largely one of derision. For President Buhari, it is an opportunity lost. All the goodwill post the 2015 elections have now been spent and it is his government that is in red and must repay the national mandate. Yet, it is not yet gloom and doom. This administration has gotten a few pass marks but they are in very insignificant subjects. It is like scoring A1 in Yoruba language, Food and nutrition and Music, while you have F9 in Mathematics, English, Chemistry and Physics. If the last few days of this administration must surely count, then they must return back to basics. Fixing Nigeria is not in big promises but in the little things. It is the fundamental things that this government must tackle. Fix the roads, get Power right, promote equity in political decisions/appointments, follow through on corruption cases, create enabling environment for businesses to thrive and revive the bloody economy. This is the ‘what’, we pay them a fortune to figure out the ‘how’. Fixing Nigeria is not rocket science!

The World is a Beautiful Place

Most of us don’t even realize how amazing our lives are. People lose the appreciation of their beautiful lives while concentrating on problems and being pessimistic about their current “terrible situation”. We consider thousands of things in our lives for granted, because it’s totally normal for us, like being able to have a shower, or to have food on our tables, day after day. Furthermore, the vast majority of us do not have to worry on whether they are going to have something to eat for the next day, as our main trouble is on what to eat the next day – something that might be a pure luxury for someone living in an area where there are limited resources of food. Have you ever noticed the fact that slum dwellers in Nigeria and even more dire places are often even happier than many in so called civilized nations, even though they lack so many things from food to – pure luxury articles like a TV – that some of us consider to be ordinary? Could it be that these people appreciate their lives a lot more, due to the fact of not being able to know whether they are able to enjoy the next day? Perhaps they don’t even focus on material things or tangibles like money, instead they enjoy the time with their family and esteem social values like deep friendships by far more than some of us do? In sum, they just appreciate that amidst all the troubles, the world is still a beautiful place.

Too often than not, we are obsessed with what we don’t have. We fantasize about where we want to be, who we want to be with and how we would like to see ourselves, all while abandoning the moments, people and places of significance that take place in our lives. There is nothing wrong with wanting change; change is good and necessary, but it doesn’t happen overnight. It is a process, rather, which is accomplished over time with transition. The problem we often face with longing for a life different than the one we have is that we treat where we are and where we want to be like an on-and-off switch. We cut off the “now” and turn on the “will be.” Making goals and planning to change your scenery should be a process where priorities change and focus sharpens, not one where one life comes to a screeching halt for the other. We've all been guilty of taking mental vacations, and we've all jumped into the visual snapshot we've projected for ourselves. But often, when we pack our mental bags we leave behind our dormant body to go through the monotonous routine of life like a corpse. This shouldn't be so. Surrendering the life you're currently living is a dangerous thing. It's a risky business that leaves us tirelessly running a race, chasing satisfaction on a treadmill, always wanting, but never having. When we make up in our minds that the present isn't important, it becomes habitual and routine. The job won't have enough benefits, one degree will suddenly turn into two and the dream house in Banana Island will soon enough become humdrum. The reality is that if we can't find happiness where we are, we won't find it where we want to be. Accomplishments will no longer hold value due to the next goal that’s pending.

Loving the struggle, embracing what it takes, understanding your sacrifices and acknowledging those who helped you along the way are all part of the process that will allow us to be better individuals. When we understand the beauty in today and embrace all it has to offer, we will learn how to appreciate the goodness we receive. The world is a beautiful place.

(Excerpts from my Book ‘The Path Less Travelled’)

7 Smart Yet Simple Ways to Handle Difficult People

1. Practice detaching yourself from other people’s bias opinions. — You may not be able control all the things people say and do, but you can decide not to be reduced by them. The way people treat you is their problem, how you respond internally is yours. What you need to remember is that the things people say and do to you is much more about them, than you. People’s reactions to you are about their perspectives, biases and past experiences. Whether people think you’re amazing, or believe you’re disgusting, again, is more about them and how they view the world. Now, I’m not suggesting we should be self-indulged narcissists and ignore all the opinions and commentary we receive from others. I’m simply saying that incredible amounts of hurt, disappointment and sadness in our lives come directly from our tendency to take things too personally. In most cases it’s far more productive and healthy to let go of other people’s good or bad opinions of you, and to operate with your own intuition and insight as your guide.

2. Wish them well and move forward with your day. — Don’t lower your standards, but do remember that removing your expectations of others is the best way to avoid being disappointed by them. Realize that there’s no reason to expect others to treat you the way you treat them—not everyone has the same heart as you. Meditate on that. Let it sink in. Ultimately, the real test is being kind to unkind people. And yes, you can always stand tall and be sincerely kind to people you strongly disagree with. Remind yourself that you never know what someone has been through in their life, or what they’re going through today. Just do your best to be kind, generous, and respectful, no mater what. Truth be told, all the hardest, coldest people you meet were once as soft as a baby. And that’s the tragedy of living. So when people are rude and difficult, be mindful—be your best. Give those around you the “break” that you hope the world will give you on your own “bad day” and you will never, ever regret it.

3. Model the behavior you want to see. — When someone insists on foisting their hostility and drama on you, be an example of a pure existence. Ignore their outlandish antics and focus on compassion. Communicate and express yourself from a place of peace, from a place of love, with the best intentions. Use your voice for good, to inspire, to encourage, to educate, and to spread the type of behavior you want to see in others. This, of course, is much easier said than done. It takes long-term practice.

4. Take positive control of negative conversations. – It’s okay to change the topic, talk about something positive, or steer conversations away from pity parties, drama, and self-absorbed sagas. Be willing to disagree with difficult people and deal with the consequences. Some people really don’t recognize their own difficult tendencies or their inconsiderate behavior. You can actually tell a person, “I feel like you ignore me until you need something.” You can also be honest if their overly negative attitude is what’s driving you away: “I’m trying to focus on positive things. What’s something good we can talk about?” It may work and it may not, but your honesty will help ensure that any communication that continues forward is built on mutually beneficial ground.

5. Proactively establish healthy and reasonable boundaries. — Practice becoming aware of your feelings and needs. Note the times and circumstances when you’re resentful of fulfilling someone else’s needs. Gradually build boundaries by saying no to gratuitous requests that cause resentfulness in you. Of course, this will be hard at first because it may feel a bit selfish. But if you’ve ever flown on a plane, you know that flight attendants instruct passengers to put on their own oxygen masks before tending to others, even their own children. Why? Because you cannot help others if you’re incapacitated. In the long run, proactively establishing and enforcing healthy and reasonable boundaries with difficult people will be one of the most charitable things you can do for yourself and those you care about. These boundaries will foster and preserve the best of you, so you can share the best of yourself with the people who matter most, not just the difficult ones who try to keep you tied up.

6. Make extra time for yourself. — Difficult people who wallow in their problems and fail to focus on solutions are obviously hard to handle. They want others to join their 24/7 pity party so they can feel better about themselves. And you may feel pressured to listen to their complaints simply because you don’t want to be seen as callous or rude, but there’s a fine line between lending a compassionate ear and getting sucked into their emotional drama. If you are forced to live or work with a difficult person, then make sure you get enough alone time to relax, rest, and recuperate. Having to play the role of a “focused, rational adult” in the face of relentless moodiness can be exhausting, and if you’re not careful, their toxic attitude can infect you. So remember that even people with legitimate problems and clinical illnesses can still comprehend that you have needs as well, which means you can politely excuse yourself when you need to.

7. Let them know that you, respectfully, do not care. — This one is essentially a last resort. If you’ve tried your best to communicate respectfully with a difficult person, or to gracefully distance yourself from them, but they insist on following you around and attacking you for whatever reason, it’s time to speak up and tell them that their words are meaningless. In such situations, I challenge you to make this your lifelong motto: “I respectfully do not care.” Say it to anyone who relentlessly passes public judgment on something you strongly believe in or something that makes you who you are. And remind yourself that you did nothing wrong. Some people will inevitable judge you no matter what you do, and that’s OK. You affected their life; don’t let them affect yours.

(MARCANDANGEL).

You Think Anybody Really Cares About You?

The movie, ‘Rocky’ is renowned for many things, but none of these things compares to the life lessons that this movie is laced with. This is one of such lessons from the movie: ‘Let me tell you something you already know. The world ain’t all sunshine and rainbows. It’s a very mean and nasty place and I don’t care how tough you are it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it. You, me, or nobody is gonna hit as hard as life. But it ain’t about how hard you hit. It’s about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward. How much you can take and keep moving forward. That’s how winning is done! Now if you know what you’re worth then go out and get what you’re worth. But you gotta be willing to take the hits, and not pointing fingers saying you ain’t where you wanna be because of him, or her, or anybody! Cowards do that and that ain’t you! You’re better than that’

The sad thing is that some people are so fixated about how they show up, how they are being perceived, what the view about them is. What such people fail to understand is that there is enough going on in every individual’s life to keep them preoccupied. The reality is that everyone in life, small or big is pursuing something. Everyone has goals they want to achieve, and as one of my friends will say, everyone needs a sponsor in one way or the other. In many ways, it is a dog eat dog situation.

One of the quick things I realized early in life is that in the final analysis, no one really has your best interest at heart as much as you do. And this is not a bad thing, it is just the way the world is. Your demon is your demon and there are places of trials in your life where everyone else is bared from the court room. There are places of personal pressures in your life where your wife, husband, children, siblings, father, mother and best friends can’t get into. It is not that they don’t love you enough to go through this with you, but the truth is that there are some burdens you bear on your own. The sooner you stop bitching about who wasn’t there for you when you needed them, and instead, take your life by the scruff of the neck, the better for you.

Dust yourself each time and face what you must. Get a few friends who will always be there. Find the positives for there are still some good in this world. Stay close to family and trudge on with your life. Don’t delude yourself that everyone is after you; you are not that important. You are not the center of everyone’s attention, and some of the greatest battles you will fight in life, you must do it alone.