7 Life Lessons I Have Learnt From Driving

1. The Road is a leveller

It doesn't matter what you drive, the road is a leveller. Until flying cars become norm, the road remains our primary source of plying. All sorts of cars ply same road. The Ricketies, the Bugattis, the Ferrari all have to make do with same means of conveyance. Just like life, the 'road' happens to us all. It doesn't matter what you drive in life, it is about your contentment in what you drive.

2. You are the driver

It doesn't matter who you have in your car, you are the driver of your life. The driver is the final arbiter in the car. You decide the route, you insist on safety standards such as seat belt usage. Just like in life, you are making choices everyday irrespective of whether you realize it or not. You must always be a player not a victim. We make choices everyday irrespective of whether or not we are conscious of it.

3. There are some circumstances you can't help

One of the biggest lessons I have learnt while driving is that there are many circumstances that you can't control. One of the biggest is the spate of traffic. You can get mad all you want but there is little you can do in this circumstance. The key is to disassociate your happiness from these small stuffs and not put your joy in abeyance. Enjoy the journey. Don't sweat the small stuffs. Don't pull out your hair for situations you can't help. The journey is the destination.

4. Your safety is your responsibility

You can learn all you want about driving procedures and standards. However, once you are behind the steering, your safety is your responsibility and not in any driving handbook. In driving just like in life, you must look out for yourself. You will not always be the priority in the lives of your friends and family. It doesn't make them bad people. Everyone is looking out for himself. Look out for yourself.

5. Beware of short cuts

Short cuts will always be your Achilles heels - so said my driving instructor many years ago. Those are profound words. My experience has always been that you can get stuck in a short cut, and that they are often road traps once you decide to take them. Stay on the main road. Stay on the road you can get support and lighting. Short cuts can kill. In life, you must use the stairs and follow the process. Many of the elevators exalted in life today are facades.

6. Stay on your lane

One of the unwritten, yet mysterious rule of driving is that once you change lanes, your former lane gains traction. It often doesn't matter what lane you are while driving, it will surely move. Many times while driving, I have had the temptation to swap lanes from mine to the other I perceive as moving. Life has taught me that all lanes move, though at different paces and at different times. Ultimately, we all arrive.

7. Defensive driving is everything

The most pivotal learning in any driving school is the act of defensive driving. At the heart of this concept is that you can't vouch for the next man driving on the road, and it is safer to assume that every other road users are lunatics. It is not enough to drive safely, you must drive to protect yourself. Just like in life, guard your self and your sanity against external influence. People will be people, and you never fully know with people. Maintain awareness and drive your life, defensively.

The Lagos Danfo Bus: Our Collective Plight

The Lagos danfo bus, with its trademark yellow colour, is a microcosm of the Nigerian state in more ways than one. The danfo bus is probably as old as Lagos state itself. Every efforts by successive governments to rebrand the danfo bus has proved abortive. It is a brand that thrives in it resistance to change. It has survived the eras of BRT and the emergence of online taxi services such as Uber and Taxify (now Bolt).

The danfo bus is a leveller of classes. In it, there are the working class of all stratas. The suit peddlers working in air conditioned offices around Victoria Island with a paltry take home. There are the traders always on the go, hurling their crafts from place to place. There are the hustlers always on the move with lack of clarity on their destinations. They revere in being on the move and can easily transit crafts depending on the need. One minute they can 'pick' a phone from an inattentive passenger on the danfo bus, the next minute they can be a driver of one big madam, and the subsequent second, they can be running errand for one big man that lives in Lekki. Their trade is in the multiple, never mind them being Jack of it all.

The danfo bus is a circus of angry men and women, who can flare up in the face of the slightest provocation. Most of the faces are scarred by telling wrinkles that could only have been inflicted by sharing the same space with fellow Lagosians. There are the occasional faces crushed by injuries and cuts. This kind is usually the hallmarks of the danfo driver and his second in command, the conductor. This is their craft's badge and the banner of hustle that admits them into the Lagos danfo hall of fame.

The danfo bus is often a beehive of conversations but none thrives better than a discussion on the government of the day. Begin a conversation with 'This our government na wa o' and you are guaranteed to have other conversationalists, never mind if they are strangers. In the danfo bus, the collective struggle and national hardship unites everyone. The solidarity is palpable and in those fleeting moments before anyone arrives at his 'bus stop' they find camaraderie of some sorts. Yet, there is the presence of the occasional 'bundle of knowledge' in most danfo buses. Usually men, these ones are peddlers of half knowledge about various subjects. Their voices are loudest and their only moment in the sun arrives when they educate their fellow danfo travellers.

Like most things synonymous with Lagos, the danfo bus is a place to 'shine your eyes.' Whatever you do, never admit to any wrong doing. Whether it's tactfully fondling a lady's breast or admitting to have paid when you have not, never surrender your initial ground. To win your case, keep your voice at a high pitch. The use of gestures, curse words and reference to 'god' will also help sell your case. There is also the need to be vigilant. If you must sleep in the danfo bus, do it with your eyes wide open.

The danfo bus is an anathema of the Nigerian state, yet it is the kind we condone. It reminds us of our collective plight, and the fact that it has refused to evolve over time is an indicator that change is not a pliable and extant word with our national life.

When The Battle Chooses You

The surest way to get yourself into trouble is to insert yourself into a fight that doesn’t concern you. In many instances in life, we must turn a blind eye, allow sleeping dogs have a field day and simply find a glass of water while minding our business. Too many battles in life are simply not worth the trouble. Yet, this is half-truth.

They say, ‘pick your battles’ but that is premised upon the assumption that you have a choice. There are some battles that leaves you with no options. The kind that arrives uninvited, squared up for the fight, throws down the gauntlet, and draws first blood. Those are battles you can’t refuse. What do we do when the battle chooses us? When life reserves some of it’s biggest blows for us? What do we do when the battle arrives at our doorstep at an inconvenient time?

We must understand the nature of the battle that chooses us. It is only when we understand the nuances of the battle that we can effectively strategize on how to fight it. At times, this battle is life’s way of keeping us in check; of stopping us from getting too comfortable. This is not the kind of battle that your loved ones help you fight. Most times, the battle that chooses us squares up against us alone. If the battle is too big, we must fight through it with patience. We must take it one day at a time. When the battle chooses us, we will need to learn from it. There must be a lesson in it for us. There must be something life is trying to teach us through the battle. There is no point whining and cursing fate for the hand it has dealt to you. Life happens to everyone; and we all are fighting different battles.

Indeed, some battles choose some of its finest soldiers. This is not a time to lose your head. This is not a time to despair. This is not a time to give in. This is not a time to feel sorry for yourself. We must fight the battle that chooses us. We must be willing to be changed by the battle that chooses us. We must believe that with God, we can win the battle that chooses us.