18 Things I Learnt in 2018

1. One day at a time. I have learnt that you will not always find all the answers, and some things will always remain grey. But the secret is to always take life one day at a time. Some things will only get clearer along the way. Don’t try to enter the future all at once. There is power in un-clarity.

2. Random check on people can be really powerful. A friend recounted to me how through a simple phone call she was able to salvage her friend who was on the brink of plunging into third mainland bridge. Care, and truly care for people. Ask ‘how are you’ and really mean it.

3. Dreams do come true. Earlier this year, I’d fiddled with the idea of how great it will be to speak on the TEDx stage someday. Interestingly, I wrote this as one of my 2018 goals even without having a clue on how. On December 1st, I ticked it off. It’s a cliché but you honestly have to see it, before you get it.

4. Stick to your plan. More than ever before, I have learnt the power of sticking to your plan; the latent power in following through. This takes discipline, but it will be worth it in the end.

5. Believe in miracles. The cynics and sceptics will easily want to brush this aside. They will tell you that there is a logical explanation for everything that happens in life. Believe what you may, but I choose to believe in miracles, and 2018 only reaffirmed this conviction.

6. To judge too quickly is both immature and inhuman. There is a bliss that comes when you are less critical of other people. People are going through stuff you have no clue about. And yes, you are not the finished article either.

7. You need to buy the ticket to win the lottery. This phrase is one I pulled out from the sporting books, but nothing can be truer. You can moan all you want, but nothing will change if you never try. Nothing ventured, nothing gained. To never try is to never know.

8. Don’t always find a reason to help. Just be kind. In a world that is perpetually trying to tell you that you need a reason to do everything, this lesson is a path less travelled. You mustn’t have a reason to be kind. Be kind because it is the right thing to do. This is how we make the world a better place beyond rhetoric.

9. Reduce your circle. One of the things age brings to us is the realization that you don’t need too many friends. Your 5,000 friends on Facebook, 10,000 followers on Twitter and 20,000 Instagram fans are all statistics when all is said and done. You need a core, a small core. Those are the people that truly counts.

10. Movies are magical. Boy! They are! I was privileged to see many fascinating movies this year but three stand out for me. Black Panther, The Greatest Showman and Kemi Adetiba’s King of Boys. They all stand out for various reasons. Take out time to see movies; they are magical.

11. The unforgotten story of the world cup. The 2018 world cup staged in Russia will always be remembered for various reasons, but it made my list for unconventional reasons. I learnt that talent is not enough, that you must reinvent yourself or go extinct, that character is everything and that football remains a powerful force.

12. Find and keep what makes you happy. Life is truly too short to spend it living a life that is not yours. Just as Steve Jobs once said, “Have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become.”

13. Understanding the malady that is societal pressure. More than ever before, I saw how this took a toll on lots of people this year. It is key to find what makes you thick, center yourself in it and define your own happiness. Never forget that you can never win with society.

14. It is fine to be tired. Realize that you will not always have it together. There are moments that tears will camp in your eyes, and your heart will ache. It is part of the journey. Rest because you are finite, but never settle there.

15. Stories matter. I like to refer to myself as a storyteller. I have always loved stories but this year, I must have read more stories than ever before. From Yaa Gyasi’s ‘Homegoing’ to Jowhor Ile’s ‘After Many Days’ to Ama Ata’s ‘No Sweetness Here’ and the list goes on. I reaffirmed my belief in stories and this culminated in me publishing my first novel, ‘Cacophony.’

16. The place of loyalty and the little things. If you are a political enthusiast, you will have had plenty to learn from Nigeria’s politics this year. There is so much to learn from the subtle fall of the once golden boy of APC, Akinwunmi Ambode. There is no point rehashing the drama here but there are lessons in loyalty and recognizing the little things (that mean so much) to be learnt.

17. Abuja is a great city. It is fitting that I am only learning this in 2018 but I needed to do a full circle on this one first. Abuja is truly a great city. The fantastic road network and the sanity of life makes it a great place. Will I choose it over Lagos? It depends.

18. Love remains a beautiful thing, so never get it twisted. This one explains itself. You might have been disappointed, heart broken or unlucky, but it doesn’t dowse the power of love. Love is and will always remain, a beautiful thing!