Wednesday, August 7, 2013

10 Excuses You Must Drop To Be Happy!

1. “It’s too late for me.” As you grow up, you see people achieve things like getting a degree, building a career, making money, getting married, having kids and so on. This sets the expectation in your mind that you too need to achieve certain things by a certain age. And if you move at a slower pace than others, this limiting belief holds you back from going after what you really want right NOW. Alternative: “Now is a perfect time to start.” – Get over the baseless, default beliefs that certain things have to be done by a certain age. The simple fact is that life is a series of events based on your own actions at any givenmoment. You can have those events happen in your life in any order or sequence you like. Age has nothing to do with it. 2. “I don’t have time.” Everyone gets the same 24 hours a day as you. How is it that some people havefound a way to make a difference during these same 24 hours? Alternative:“I need to properly manage my time.” – Become conscious of the way you use your time. Get ruthless about cutting out time-wasting activities. Schedule, prioritize and delegate as necessary. Focus on the quality of the things you do, instead of the quantity. 3. “I’m too plain and boring.” Boring vs. interesting is a matter of choice andopinion. Each of us is given a stage, a scene and a few props. What makes a difference in the story of your life is how you choose to interpret and play your role. Alternative:“I’m in charge of writing my own story.” – Choose to stop being boring. Figure out what ‘interesting’ means to you, and everytime you feel that you are too boring, do one thing that will move you towards your definition of interesting. 4. “I don’t deserve it.” There are two versions of this. The first makes you think that you are not worthy of something beautiful like love, respect, successand so on. The second makes you feel that you are unfairly targeted by life’s difficulties. Either way, this excuse ties you up and holds you down. Alternative:“I have plenty of good options in front of me.” – When you catch yourself wondering “why me?”, ask “why not me?” Remember, in the grand scheme of things, youare just the same as anyone else; neither nature, nor God, displays favoritism or unfairness. So learn to accept both the good and the bad that falls on your plate with grace.(Read The Power of Now.) 5. “I’m responsible for X,Y or Z, so taking care of myself in not a priority.” This one is very common with parents, especially parents of little kids – I should know, I’m the queen of making this excuse! But unless you take good care of yourself, unless you approach life on a full tank, you arenot doing anyone any favors. Alternative:“I am a priority.” – Make time for yourself, to sleep, eat right, exercise, and replenish. It’s not selfishness, it’s just an elevated level of caring. When you are at yourbest, you can give the best to others. (Note: If you are a parent, be sure to stop by afineparent.comwhere we discuss this topic indetail.) 6. “Nobody understands me.” Everyone has their own life to worry about; everybody is busy. At the end of the day, nobody has the time or energy to figure anyone else out. If it really matters to you thatsomeone understands you better, simply communicate and make it easy for them to do so. Alternative:“I need to communicate clearly and act accordingly.” – Quit playing games. Say what you need to sayand do what you must. (And realize that it is not necessary thateveryone understands and agrees with you all the time.) 7. “Nobody cares about what I careabout.” Can you imagine what would happen if everyone behind a good cause took on this attitude? We’d never have any charitable organizations, fuel-efficient cars, health breakthroughs, peace efforts, literacy drives…! Alternative:“I care about this because it’s important.” – Take a stand. If you care about something, even something personal, then become a champion of the cause and help others understand why you care so much. 8. “I’m not smart enough.” It starts off innocently, you try to do something and either get stuck or fail, and youthink, “I’m so stupid.” Over years of repeated use though, sadly, this statement becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. Alternative:“It’s time to practice.” – When you catch yourself talking down to your own intelligence, stop. Identify the one thing that makes you feel unintelligent and invest some time and energy into learning how to improve in this area. Build up that confidence! Start with something small, figure out how to perfect the next small step. The more you learn, and the more setbacks you overcome, the more confident you will become. 9. “My parents are responsible for the way I turned out.” There ought to be an expiration date on this one. Yes, your parents are responsible for helping you start the story of your life. As you grow though, it is your responsibility to take things into your hands and write out the rest of your story with your own decisions and actions Alternative:“I am now in full control of my ownlife.” – Make a conscious choice to let your past make you better, not bitter. You can’t go back and change how you were raised. You can, however, start now and change how the rest of your life transpires. 10. “I don’t have enough discipline and drive.” Can you remember why you think this way? Chances are, you forced yourself to do something that you weren’t excited about and then you failed. Then, over a period of time you started to believe that you simply don’t have what it takes to stay disciplined. Alternative:“I just need to figure out how to motivate myself through this.” – Instead of forcing yourself to do something you don’t like, try to trick yourself, and automate as much of the required discipline as you possibly can by implementing habits that support your desired end result. Research hasconsistently shown that willpower is a limited and exhaustible resource for everyone, not just you. Those that are successful at staying disciplined are the ones who find ways to replace the brute force method with more creative, subtle routines and habits.(MANDG).

2 comments:

  1. Wow..Samuel dis is some good write up,I followed it al d way & used it as a check for maself cos for mi being perfect is nt an impossibility. Gud one brov*thumbs up*

    ReplyDelete
  2. I am humbled! Many thanks dear.... Glad it appealed to you!

    ReplyDelete

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